Thursday, May 13, 2010

Turtle Surgery, Challenging Authority, & Chasing Birds

Guess what! I got a new toy. His name is Turtle. I've almost chewed his leg off, and Mom put him away till she gets around to sewing it back on; maybe I'll get it back someday. Anyway, I s'pose I ought to tell you that I've been in a little trouble lately, mostly about where I tinkle.....Mom says the internet tells her I'm going through adolescence and that I'm challenging authority, like when Dad throws the golf ball, I used to bring it back to him for Cheerios, but these days, it's way more fun to make him beg. Whoever the internet is, I like when it tells Mom about puppies 'cause it makes it okay to be me.

I mean, I got potty training down just perfect for a while, and you know how nutso Mom and Dad are about that kinda stuff, so they were real happy and told me Good Boy a lot! But sometimes it feels good to let 'er rip wherever I'm standing; I even peed on their bed (good thing Mom had a big, thick pad on it, otherwise Goodwill would have been getting a nice, new mattress with one tiny yellow stain in the middle of it this morning), and that got me exiled to my crate for the whole night, probably for a gazillion nights to come, 'cause Dad is still pretty mad at me, and Mom said I would be spending a couple of hours a day in the crate, to remind me to hold it. I don't mind so much, and I never put up a fuss; she always puts in an organic biscuit and my blue chewie dawg, and it gives me time to ponder life's important stuff, like chewing.

But hey, I play outside a lot, too, and I've discovered birds! We got lotsa birds. There's a nest of robins on the arbor, a nest of bluebirds in the little birdhouse Dad built, a nest of brown thrushes in the Chinese Witch Hazel, and a nest of noisy Mockingbirds in the Holly bush. I love to chase robins best because they're brave and cocky, and they steal the worms from our yard, all day long! I'm 'bout the fastest dog in the world, but I haven't caught one yet because just about the time I'm closing in and ready to nab one, it cheats and flies off! Watch out, suckas, one o' these days.......

Sometimes I wonder how Mom ever made it without me, though. I help her do everything, like sorting dirty laundry.......well, not actually sorting it, but I do grab socks and take off with them; it gives Mom exercise when she goes to find them. When she writes checks, I like to sit on the desk. She says I make a cute, fluffy paper weight; I'm very good and don't bother her papers, but I love smelling them. Did you know our mailman owns a cat? I can tell just from smelling the letters. I watch the writing as it comes out of her pen. Maybe I'll be able to make it write when I grow up.

So, that's how things have been going, workin' on the ol' potty training again, chasing ornery birds, helping Mom with the chores, and hoping Turtle gets well soon. (P.S. Mom says don't worry if you can't see my eyes. I can see fine, but we're trying to let my face hair grow out. I'll look totally awesome!)

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